Deirdre Geraghty

When I was released from my second spell in psychiatric hospital there was what they called ‘Care in the Community’ so one felt there was back up out of hospital. Again when we moved to Norwich there was a good set up of out of hospital support. That all disappeared under the Conservatives and it’s impossible to get admitted as a drastic shortage of beds. Absolutely dreadful!

I took my antipsychotics again this morning as I do everyday but there was a time when my life was absolutely terrible for many many years. I don’t know which time was the most horrific – whether it was all those years that I was psychotic or the many many years I was on the depo injections which I lived minute by minute which was a living nightmare – which were even worse l think. And the old tablets were terrible too. That must be taken into consideration when thinking about this subject. Not just whether l was pliable.

I had what was a very real dream where I was going to do a pregnancy test when I went for a wee and that we couldn’t do a DNA test until the child is born. Something on Coronation Street earlier that I am sure triggered it.

I spent twenty minutes trying to get into one of my accounts this morning. I reset my password but still couldn’t open it. I hate technology sometimes. What a faff!

I have been having very weird dreams although I suppose all dreams are a little that way. But dreaming about sorting out the insurance policy on my houseplant that isn’t doing too well – which, of course, I don’t have. Very strange. It isn’t even poorly. Or the payments on several shop bought sandwiches – also very strange!

I took my wrist support off yesterday mid afternoon and as I was doing okay left it off overnight. This morning it hurt like crazy so I put it back on again. I tried to take it off a little while ago but it hurt so I think I have given up on it for today. The doctor had told me to continue with the support for as long as it needed it.

I am very tired this morning – lots to do but too weary to do any of it – it will all have to wait!

I have just got back from the hospital where I found out that the problem with my wrist was the ligament which had popped out and now popped back in again. It might keep happening so I might need surgery.

I didn’t get to sleep until late and saw Kamala Harris and Tim Walx speaking. I am really hopeful that they will save the USA from a backward step. Amongst all the other things I am a firm believer that every woman should be able to access abortion and that every child should be a wanted child.

If you have ever wondered how Hitler got away with it and if it could ever happen again – he had a whole Propaganda Department deciding what and how to tell the population – just like we have our Spin Doctors and we must make sure it never happens again!