Deirdre Geraghty

I woke up just before midnight and I was thinking about what my son had said about doing more on my hudl 2. I have been doing my grocery shopping online on my computer which I have found to be much easier and you are able to have more than one order pending. Also I have been checking out my lottery ticket as well. So 12 o’clock l went and got my tablet. Firstly I tried to sign in on Tesco. com but the keyboard wasn’t visible. I tried to work it out for about ten minutes when I diverted my attention to trying to get into my account on the lottery. No can do! Either l am just stupid or these things are not possible.

Chani came and helped me with my blog when it went wrong and also with my Skype when she had finished her work. She has become a good friend and when she told me that she might not be able to continue coming in the future I felt very sad. She is starting a course to become a support worker in mental health after Christmas and thinks she might be able to fit us all in. Somehow I don’t think so.

I love the John Lewis penguin commercial. For ages l pondered over whether it was real or not. I looked on Google but still didn’t find my answer. Eventually I asked my son. He is better at investigating and sent me a link. I had thought it was too good to be a real penguin but very well done.

The energy saving light bulbs in my dining room keep blowing so I had an electrician replace all the wiring and fittings in the ceiling. That was only a few months ago but it’s gone again. Unfortunately I can’t change a ceiling light as I can’t raise both of my arms with my shoulder pain so Zoe, my neighbour, very kindly came and changed it for me. It is very hard to accept that this is yet another thing I can’t do for myself.

Yesterday I went to the Silver Road Community Centre Christmas Craft Fayre with my neighbour Zoe and children who live either side of me. The ladies from the craft group were there and Julie (a labour councillor) was on the ‘Father Christmas’ stall. We all went in to see him and he was an excellent Santa Claus. Zoe also bought them a knitted animal each. It had been raining heavily all day and my breathing wasn’t too good on the way there and even worse on the way home. With the emphysema I don’t think I will be going out much longer this winter.

Socialization, otherwise known as conditioning or upbringing. That training which makes one person an eskimo and another a jew, muslim or christian. Once you realize that’s what it is, it is easier to break free of it, although that is easier said than done.

Mary very kindly took Molly and I to the vets for Molly’s final post op check up. Everything is fine so she can now eat dry food again. The nurse suggested that I buy ‘senior’ dry food and mix it with her ‘dental’ food. I wasn’t really up for it at the time but will go back and get a small bag to try. I also picked up a new tablet for Lily’s bladder disease. This morning she ate it which was such a relief because she wasn’t eating her other tablet. If I try to give her a tablet she rolls up her tongue which makes it impossible.

It doesn’t take very much for me to feel paranoid. I don’t mean the paranoia l have felt before when I feel l am in danger and people are going to try to kill me. I mean low level paranoia when I am thinking that people don’t like me or l have upset someone which I have always felt from time to time. Nobody usually has any idea that I am feeling this way so these days l tell them which saves a lot of heartache.

My microwave was dying so I stayed up till 3.30 the other night looking on my tablet for a replacement. My son ordered me one and it came yesterday. I had been worrying that I would have problems working it out but my friend Mary came and helped me install it and I found that all I had to do was ignore the functions I ignored on my last one. What a relief!

I like the TV channel called animal planet. I watch it for a couple of hours most mornings and continue to be shocked by the terrible state some people allow their pets to get into. I know what it’s like not to be able to afford a vet but there are alternatives if you are really in that position and it doesn’t take a lot to at least give them food, water and shelter.